Why We Embrace Work-Life Integration—Not Balance, Ep #014


So many people believe that the key to a healthy relationship is the proper work-life balance, but we believe in work-life integration. We work together, we live together, and we have built a life and a business together. Why would we want to separate those things? In this episode we will talk about this commonly asked question and what we do instead. We’ll give you some helpful resources along the way.

Highlights From Our Conversation

  • [0:50] Work-life integration
  • [2:15] Why we don’t compartmentalize
  • [7:35] Wheel of Life
  • [13:45] Strategies we’ve used
  • [18:20] Timing is everything
  • [21:45] Be mindful of your headspace
  • [24:45] Be supportive of each other
  • [27:15] Figure out what works for you

Human beings weren’t built to compartmentalize

There is a reason so many people struggle to find a work-life balance—because it’s not the way we as humans work. Let me give you an example: If Christy and I have a fight that doesn’t find immediate resolution, it weighs on my mind. I can’t go close a business deal and expect to be in the right headspace, right? It’s because my heart and my emotions are elsewhere.

We work and live at home and it is natural for us to talk about work when thoughts come to our mind. Sure, there are times when we need to realize we shouldn’t be talking shop. So instead of compartmentalizing work in one box and our personal life in another, we build boundaries. Keep listening as we talk about what this means and how it is a better strategy for us.

Utilizing the Wheel of Life to find your priority

Yes, you read that right. One singular priority. In the “7 Game Changers for Highly Effective Couples” that we offer we include an example of the ‘wheel of life’. We also have it in our show notes below. It’s a great tool you can use to assess where you need things to change in your life. Identify where you are, where you want to be—and then strategize and find action steps to take to get you there.

Then, in each season of your life, focus on the one part of the wheel you need to develop. As you invest in growing in the areas you’re weakest in, the wheel will become more balanced. It’s all about finding the right formula that works for you in your relationship. There’s no solid answer and it’s not a science. It’s an art. Keep listening as we talk about our priorities and what’s been important to us in different seasons.

It’s all about timing—and knowing your boundaries

Integration as a strategy doesn’t mean we don’t set boundaries. There are times where we just aren’t feeling well and can’t get in the right headspace to work. It’s okay to recognize that it’s time to focus on self-care, and set aside work for a time. Whether it’s going for a walk, doing yoga, or even taking a nap you need to prioritize your well-being.

We aren’t all work and no play. We also set aside time for our daughter and each other. We spend time doing things that bring us joy. Christy and I also take the time to connect with each other every night. We talk about our day and what we learned. We may even touch on work things. It’s all about having an awareness of when it’s the right time for something.

Find the best work-life integration model that works for you

Eventually, as you try different strategies and choose different focuses, you will find a rhythm that works for you. That is key. Don’t be afraid to test things out and scrap them if they don’t work. Then you try another strategy until you find a way to integrate your life and work that works for the both of you.

Dave Meltzer has 4 Core Principles that we feel holds the whole wheel of life together:

  1. Practice gratitude and appreciation—focus on the positive and all of the ways you’ve been blessed.
  2. Have empathy and compassion for yourself and others. Learn to forgive and move on.
  3. Be accountable. When you make a mistake, own it. More importantly, learn from it and change.
  4. Communicate effectively from the heart. Inspire others.

Hopefully some of these strategies we find helpful can make an impact for you! Listen to this episode as we cover this topic we love!

Resources & People Mentioned

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